The Uninvited Birthday Party

My husband ended up with my best friend of 18 years. Today, I went to their child's third birthday party. She still sucks a pacifer. Their daughter is the only innocent one. I actually like their daughter, and I like my child's father, my husband, my ex best friends boyfriend. HA. Still, the whole scenario was weird and uncomfortable to me. I choose not to be around my ex best friend. Our morals do not come even close to being similar. I can honestly say that I am a better person than her, and that chills me to the bone because I usually do not believe myself to be better than anyone else in the world, but as usual there is always an exception to the rule.

The whole experience for me was uncomfortable because I was among the biggest backstabbers I have ever known. I hate people who can be nice to your face, but talk so much shit behind your back when they think you aren't listening. Thats what this group was. Still, there is a part of me that was really happy to see one person there whose name will remain anonymous. It was nice that when I walked in, he was genuinely happy to see me. He made sure I knew it too by giving me a sincere hug. His wife on the other hand attempted to muster all the sincerity she could for her hug....but it still didn't feel sincere. I mean, if you wanted to care enough to hug me when you see me, then, why aren't we friends, why didn't we remain friends throughout this ordeal.

I was asked if I still sang. Why bother asking me that? Music is my life, and everyone I know knows that little fact. So, I answered.....Of course, for money. Then, goes on to tell the room how great of a voice I have. The room knew this already. I was the leper in this room. Why being up my talent that everyone is aware of? I hope my talents were not being made fun of. I choose to believe the sincerity in her voice was real in that regard, but why even bother talking to me when you are stuck up the ass of my worst enemy.

Now, onto the best friend. I can't believe I was ever friends with her. I feel such regret that I once called someone like her my best friend. I regret every thing about our friendship, and I am so happy that it has ended for good. There is NO WAY I will ever be close to her again. Today just confirmed that our morals and values are too different to be able to be friends. I actually HAVE morals and values. She's just MEAN. Thats the best I can explain it. Shes mean to everyone, including her own sister who has gained a little weight and is sensitive about it. I wonder if she will one day call her own daughter a fat ass since it is so commonplace to call her sister that. I wouldn't put it past her. Funny thing is, no one seems to mind how mean she is. I don't think anyone sees it because she hands you the insult with this sugary, shit eating grin.

My life is good. My life is better without my ex best friends negative energy in it. It may have taken her breaking a condom and getting pregnant to keep my husband.....it worked....but she'll never be anyone worthy. Our values will never match. Our morals will never come close to being similar. I am so much better off without her in my life, and I have sooooo glad that she is GONE.

Good Riddance best friend. You were the worst best friend I ever had. I am so much happier now without your negativity in my life.