Sick and Horror

SICK. That is the essence of this household for the last week. I had a bad cold, and now Skylar is sick. She  started running a fever last night that was high enough for me to stay up all night worrying, and feeding her Motrin. She complained that her throat was hurting really bad, and was completely sure she had strep throat. I knew I felt the same way so Im sitting with her until it passes. I went to McDonald's and got her lunch. Now, we are sitting in front of the TV watching Jaws together. Before Jaws, we watched Jurrasic Park. Sky loved Jurrassic Park since the main character was a paleontologist, which is what she wants to be when she grows up (or archeologist).

I remember getting so mad at her father for holding her when she was an infant while watching Puppet Master., Hellraiser, etc. I was planning on being protective of my first and only child. I was going to shield her from the TV and all its flawed humanity. Then, I remembered that as a kid I was shielded, and I bucked against the system, so maybe shielding wasn't the proper way to raise a child. Maybe I should try something different.

I did. I stopped bitching about the horror movies, and I let her watch them. She is a fan and literally has been since birth. Ill never forget her 5th Christmas when she told me, "Momma, I dont care what Santa brings me for Christmas, but I REALLLLLY want that Chucky doll". That Chucky doll is still standing in her room 5 years later. Its one of the only toys that has made its stay in her room as she has gotten older. She even dressed up as Chucky for Halloween, and I did a GREAT job if I say so myself. 

Chucky or Child's Play  has always been her favorite movie. She also loves Coraline, Nightmare Before Christmas, Rocky Horror Picture Show, and Freddy or Nightmare on Elm Street. I let her watch Halloween II with me a couple a of night ago. 

Sometimes she gets scared. "The Strangers" scared the beejesus out of her. She got over it quickly though when I would knock on the wall and torture her while asking, "Is Tamara home?" I had too. The kid wouldn't answer the front door after watching that movie. Now, it has become one of her favorites, and when you ask, "Is Tamara Home?" She gets stares at you sarcastically because she KNOWS its fake. 

As any good parent would, I worried that my child wouldn't feel empathy toward other humans if I let her watch horror. I was raising her differently than anyone I had ever met. I was giving her freedom in a world where most parents shield their children. I, more or less, let her make her own rules as long as those rules were acceptable in my eyes also. We created the rules together. 

I have done a lot of things differently in my parenting, but I wouldn't change a single detail of anything I've done. I have a kid who is popular in school, wanted by everyone, great grades, an artist, a budding musician, loves horror, loves rock music, but is still human enough to feel great empathy and sadness when needed, and tries to help everybody she meets. She has heard curse words her whole life, but has never used one. Well, except in kindergarten when she told the teacher she thought her whole name was M. Skylar Princess Punkass Angelbaby.

Still, when I look back...I dont think it was my parenting as much as I just got lucky. I got real lucky. 

My child is brighter than all the stars that litter the sky.

I'll be the greatest fan in her life.